Monday, September 12, 2011

Of Attachments and starting fresh

The other day, “Kamau took my phone and “kept it safely” for me and then over the weekend, him and his cousins decided I haven’t been keeping my stuff in the house well, and the idiots not only took my electronics, but they violated me in such ways! They took my shoes! And the ones that hurt the most were Alexander McQueen skull boots that I loved with all my heart and I cried my eyes out went to the cops and reported my stolen goods and after listing this down with the officer in charge, I realized the futility of it all. My things weren’t going to be recovered at all.

At the cop station, there was a child, a little boy, about 5 years old and apparently, he was lost and had been brought a long ways to here, he was nibbling on a scone and looked like he dint have a care in the world. I sat down to talk to him, he said his name was “Afisa”, dint know where his house was or the name of his mother, smh. By the way, his teacher is called, wait for it….. ”Teacher”. Neat, huh?

This little tyke dint have a place to sleep and there I was fretting over my shoes and what-nots! I felt shame and then I started worrying about him. It was about 9PM by then and no one had come looking for him and there he was in the raggedy couch (or semblance of it) his feet caked with mud and nodding off to sleep as if it was the most natural thing in the world to do.

Well, I went home after I realized that the cops weren’t going to help me get anything back and after seeing that little boy who dint have a care in the world as long as he had a place to lay his head.

Gets you thinking, doesn’t it?
Sometimes, we get so attached to things; we forget to see what is really important. We do the same in relationships, we concentrate so much on the things we want to see and feel we forget to enjoy the feelings and moments in-between. Sometimes we get lost in the “relationship” that we want to be in, we forget what we have.

The same way I was so excited about having a pair of Alexander McQueen skull boots, I treasured them instead of wearing and enjoying them because, in my mind, I had waited so long to get them I wanted to keep the shoes and just look at them. When Kamau took them, I lost both chances; to wear and look at them.

After the whole episode, I donated over half my clothes, bags and shoes to charity because I wanted to sever my attachment ties to stuff. It was hard to let go, but once I started, it became easier to just put them in the bags and say bye.
After this whole being robbed issue and after I moved houses, I decided my life needed a complete overhaul at least emotionally, I decided to not hang on to people, being a free spirit was more appealing and getting rid of all the emotional baggage was what I needed. I gave up all my attachments and started on a clean slate, starting every relationship anew was amazing and now, I am feeling much better about everything.

I am starting to feel like am writing a self help column and there I stop.
Next time you are clearing your closet, think about doing the same with the relationships in your life, some of them are detrimental and you are better off without them; like the raggedy pair of pants that are just taking up space in your closet, get rid of the raggedy relationships too.